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Fireworks Oreos

Fireworks Oreos

Did somebody call an Oreo executive a basic bitch or something? Everyone's fave sandwich cookie company is acting like they've got something to prove lately with all the crazy flavors they've been rolling out. This time it isn't even a…

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Thin Mints Cereal

Thin Mints Cereal

Do we even need to write anything about this product? It's officially licensed Thin Mints cereal. If you aren't already looking for the button you need to click to get at least one box of this on the way to…

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Sex Sells

EXCLUSIVE: Sex Sells

You don't have to be a total piece of shit wannabe entrepreneur with a library of unread marketing books in the garage of your Hollywood hills home to know that sex sells. Just check the spam folder of your email. Probably…

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Blueberry Pie Oreos

Blueberry Pie Oreos

OREO recently began putting out some pretty crazy limited edition flavors and, if you haven't tried any of them then drunkMall recommends testing the waters with the blueberry pie flavor. We found these while hunting down items for our Japanese Candy…

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Milk and Cookie Shot Maker

Milk and Cookie Shot Maker

Listen, Santa ain't got time for your glass of milk and plate of cookies bullshit this year. Have you ever even considered the logistics of one fat man being pulled around the globe by flying reindeer to give presents to…

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Chocolate Matcha Cookies

Chocolate Matcha Cookies

It may not be legal for us to suggest that these matcha chocolate cookie sandwiches will change your life, so we won't say that. But this is certainly a game-changer when it comes to the sandwich cookie game. Oreos are…

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Howling Wolf Cookie Cutter

Howling Wolf Cookie Cutter

Okay, so, yeah, we totally found this cookie cutter on accident. We were trying to find some cool Howlin' Wolf merch on Amazon, so we'd have an excuse to talk about our favorite Blues singer of all time, and we…

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Bad Fortune Cookies

Bad Fortune Cookies

Fortune cookies have always kind of been some bullshit... Like, obviously, fortune-telling isn't "real" anyway. But if they really want to sell the illusion then they should at least not have every single fortune be some vaguely positive, complimentary or hopeful…

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Doughnut Warming Coffee Mug

The Best Morning Ever Mug

Keep your coffee and doughnut warm with The Best Morning Ever Mug! Studies have shown that coffee loses its flavor as it cools. And there's a reason doughnut shops turn on a light when they've just baked a fresh batch.…

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Accidental Genitals

EXCLUSIVE: Accidental Genitals

It's the #1 rule of marketing: Sex Sells! Attractive people wearing suggestive clothing or making "do me" eyes at the camera have nothing to do with 90% of the products being sold to us every day. And, yet - there…

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Cookie Dunking Hook

Cookie Dunking Hook

Have you recently won the lottery or come into a large sum of money through the passing of a family member? It's time to stop dunking cookies in milk with your own fingers like a common peasant! Use a cookie…

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Kinky Cookies Recipe Book

Kinky Cookies Recipe Book

Are cookies kinky now? Is this a thing? How long has this been a thing? Why is "kinky cookies" so fun to say? Try it out - kinky cookies, kinky cookies, kinky cookies.... Anyway, this is a cookbook of cookies…

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