Life is like a dick. When it gets hard, it might be full of candy but the only way to find out is to hit it over and over with a stick.
Life is also a lot like a bachelorette party. You’re simply trying to get through the night, have like two beers at the bar… Watch the game… and then the worst thing that has ever happened becomes your entire reality.
You aren’t alone. The other people who were in the bar before Bridepocalypse are your only family now. But it’s not enough to drown out the screams. And, oh god… The dicks. There are dicks everywhere. Anything you can imagine having a dick on it or being a dick has a dick on it or is a dick.
Oh look! There’s even a dick piñata…
[Want more products with a sexual theme that may or may not make any sense at all? You’re looking for drunkMall’s Sex Sells gift guide!]
P.S. You know we love you, ladies!