skip to Main Content
MENU/SEARCH
2018: Cool Calendars!

2018: Cool Calendars!

Alright, people, you know the drill! One after another, the years keep on coming. Time flies, who can keep track of the years, etc., etc. That's what calendars are for, you know. Here's the problem, though. Every year ends with…

View Post
EXCLUSIVE: The Weird and Wild World of Sex Toys!

EXCLUSIVE: The Weird and Wild World of Sex Toys!

Ladies aaaaand Gentlemen! Step right up, right this way --- to your very own treasure chest of personal pleasures! This week we're transforming a small corner of drunkMall into a one-of-a-kind sex shop experience. Maybe you've visited the local lion's den…

View Post
EXCLUSIVE: The Hangover Survival Guide

EXCLUSIVE: The Hangover Survival Guide

Congratulations! You played yourself, yet again. It's the morning after. You're pretty sure you had an amazing time last night but you don't really remember. Let's hope it was an epic evening because your body is paying full retail price for it today...…

View Post
Centipede Mini Arcade

Centipede Mini Arcade

When was the last time you found a good Centipede arcade machine? Oh, sure. You can find one. But the joystick's gonna be wonky - moving your guy in one direction will be way faster than moving it in the…

View Post
Mobile 3D Theater

Mobile 3D Theater

This is the future millennials want. Full sensory retreat into a digital reality! Absolute social isolation from the imperfect people around you! Total immersion within your favorite movies, TV shows and video games! Probably most of you by now have…

View Post
Mini-Pixelated The Tick

Mini-Pixelated The Tick

The Tick is back, baby! In this age of rebooting classic television shows that were much better off left in the past - Fuller House, anyone? - Amazon somehow brought The Tick into 2017 as nothing short of a phenomenal, live-action superhero…

View Post
Bear Timers

Bear Timers

Do burned cupcakes taste like bear's shit you found in the woods? Yes, they do. Listen, we all know everyone who clicked on this post has a Pinterest addiction. (And you should 100% share it to your boards.) How many…

View Post
Relativity Watch

Relativity Watch

Time is all, like, relative, man. At least that's what we're told. Okay, look, you obviously don't end up creating a website to enable drunk shoppers if you're smart at science stuff. So, yeah, none of us really know what…

View Post
Hunky Jewelry Holder

Hunky Jewelry Holder

Sometimes you just need a big, strong man in your life to hold up your jewelry... with his dick. Or, actually, it doesn't have to be about "need." It can be entirely about "want." And it doesn't have to be…

View Post
Bunny Lamp

Bunny Lamp

Did some bunny order a new lamp? Not yet - but that's what you're about to do. Everyone needs lamps. And everyone needs an excuse to smile every day for no stupid reason. Now, obviously, the same thing isn't going…

View Post
Monster House Slippers

Monster House Slippers

Everyone says their favorite season is fall. That's because everyone who talks about their favorite season is inherently social enough to be talking about their favorite season. If you get that question in front of everyone then you'll find that…

View Post
Travel Shower Vine

Travel Shower Vine

We're all still pretending that any bottle of liquid larger than 2 ounces is a critical threat to the survival of all the human beings on an airplane? Shit is ridiculous. You ever watch what airport security does with the…

View Post
Pancake Bot

Pancake Bot

This is what the future looks like. Choose any art form you want, no matter how high or low - music, sculpture, graffiti, painting, filling a squeeze bottle with pancake batter and creating amazing designs on a hot cooking surface...…

View Post
Sword-Style Fly Swatter

Sword-Style Fly Swatter

En garde! You know, there are two kinds of people in this world. People who kill houseflies and people who have homes where you don't want to hang out. On top of there being flies all over the place, they…

View Post
Baby Dragon Mummy

Baby Dragon Mummy

Turns out dragons are real. Look, we're just as surprised as you are but what are you gonna do, ignore evidence when it's placed right in front of your eyes? This isn't a Photoshop job. This isn't a TV show…

View Post