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Baphomet Statue

Baphomet Statue

  • Feb 21, 2017

Don't freak out. We're not trying to convert you to some pagan religion right now or anything. It's just a statue of Baphomet. You know, goth stuff! Everyone should go through a goth phase at least once in their life.…

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Booger Guy Egg Yolk Separator

Booger Guy Egg Yolk Separator

  • Feb 19, 2017

Separating egg yolks and egg whites is a total pain but it just got a whole lot grosser! Wait - easier. Separating eggs just got a whole lot easier! Simply crack eggs in to the top of the container, as…

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Memory Foam Wallet

Memory Foam Wallet

  • Feb 18, 2017

This is basically the Crocs of wallets. Crocs - who ever thought that a type of footwear could compete with Nickelback for the title of Most Easily Mocked Thing in Western Society? But have you ever tried a pair on,…

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Charcoal Face Mask

Charcoal Face Mask

  • Feb 17, 2017

Charcoal face masks are a huge trend right now. We can't really read the packaging on this one because we had to look for a charcoal face mask marketed to other countries, for obvious reasons. Oh, the reasons aren't obvious?…

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Doggystyle Skeleton Sex Statue

Doggystyle Skeleton Sex Statue

  • Feb 15, 2017

The hip bone's connected to the butt bone when this statue is on display! You know what they say, everyone's the same on the inside. We're all just skeletons banging it out with each other when the lights are off,…

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GIVEAWAY: Face Blanket

GIVEAWAY: Face Blanket

  • Feb 14, 2017

There are certain times in life when the world needs to forget about your face for a while. For those times, there is now: Face Blanket! Face Blanket drapes over your head and completely obscures your face from the world,…

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Mermaid Titties Incense Burner

Mermaid Titties Incense Burner

  • Feb 14, 2017

If you like boobs and incense then this is the incense burner for you! Now, straight up, we have no idea how this thing works but it's called a backflow incense burner. Whatever backflow is, we're assuming that's what causes…

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Vincent Van Gogh Action Figure

Vincent Van Gogh Action Figure

  • Feb 13, 2017

X-Men and The Flash aren't the kind of heroes everyone needs but those are pretty much the only game in town for action figures. It makes sense. The word "action" is right there. The little doll has to have moving…

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Penis Worship Lighter

Penis Worship Lighter

  • Feb 12, 2017

In the long tradition of greasy gold chains worn on exposed hairy chests and TIME TO FUCK wristwatches, we proudly direct your attention to this lighter in the form of a gargantuan golden cock being embraced (worshipped?) by a naked…

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EXCLUSIVE: Sex Sells

EXCLUSIVE: Sex Sells

  • Feb 11, 2017

You don't have to be a total piece of shit wannabe entrepreneur with a┬álibrary of unread marketing books in the garage of your Hollywood hills home to know that sex sells. Just check the spam folder of your email. Probably…

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Storm Glass

Storm Glass

  • Feb 06, 2017

Nobody really knows when or where storm glass was invented... But in the 1800s, a sea captain by the name of Robert FitzRoy* was sailing around South America with Charles Darwin and Robert ran some experiments (or whatever) with storm…

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Pink Lips Ashtray

Pink Lips Ashtray

  • Feb 06, 2017

These ceramic ashtrays look like an open pair of lips. And, yeah, that's a little weird because if you imagine a cigarette being ashed into an open mouth, that's pretty damn gross. But also it totally fits in with any…

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