SUGAR RUSH: Donut Binge
National Doughnut Day was last week, which is pretty cute as far as made-up holidays go. Like this isn’t America all of the sudden? This country RUNS on doughnuts, people!
You want to know how important doughnuts are?
Go type “doughnuts” into Google.
The top result is probably Wikipedia but they show you some places close to you where you can get doughnuts first because they know you already know what one is and the only reason you’d just type “doughnuts” into a search engine is because you must be having some sort of doughnut emergency. Google is so helpful.
Anyway, we waited until after the made up marketing holiday to do this post so you’d know we’re serious about the subject. It’s not about jumping on a bandwagon. It’s about enjoying a damn fine doughnut (or three) and looking at a bunch of cool other stuff that looks like doughnuts.
No cops allowed!
Just kidding. It’d be great if people actually buy this stuff so please show it to every police officer you know.
#1 Breakfast Lollipops
We’re all here for the same reason: we like doughnuts. There will be some major doughnut porn below but first you’ve got to check out this new take on the medium.
These breakfast lollipops are legit. That doughnut sucker has a sweet coconut flavor with a strawberry dip! Powerful flavor combo…
#2 Pool Float Donut
You can’t float around on a real donut. They’re too small and even if you made one big enough to sit on then it would get all soggy and fall apart. (Waste of an epic-sized donut, if you ask us.)
Not a problem!
Someone went and designed a pool float that looks like a big frosted donut with a bite taken out of it! You can get your float with pink frosting or chocolate (it’s brown – there are pics) and both kinds come with sprinkles.
#3 Doughnut Knee Socks
Need some new knee socks?
Yes, you do, whether you know it or not. Because these frosted pink doughnut knee socks are out there and you don’t own them!
(Or maybe you do own them, in which case you should feel free to share a link to this post on social media and tell everyone how much you love the knee socks you own like the ones in this post.)
#4 Donut Soaps
Donuts are rarely a part of what we think of as “clean living” but it’s time to change that.
These wonderful soaps look exactly like delicious donuts. Like, it could possibly even lead to some hilarious mistakes. Or look at it this way, if you’re a parent or something and you need to follow up on a threat to wash someone’s mouth out with soap then this could be an easy way to begin that process.
#5 Doughnut-Shaped Pool Table
Take everything you know about the game of billiards and forget it because you’ve never played on a table like this!
Created as something of a design project, this pool table is made to look (surprise) a donut. The attention to detail in creating the effect is pretty amazing, though. There are more pictures through the link.
From above, you can see that the wood around the side is cut to varying lengths so the pink “icing” of the felt looks like the uneven icing you’d expect on a real donut.
The balls are the sprinkles!
With the hole in the middle, a player could even duck under the table to get inside and shoot from there. This would obviously make the shot much easier, so should only be reserved for players with a handicap, like kids.
Heads up, you can’t buy this thing (at least not yet) but you could make your own if you really want one after seeing this one.
#6 Gourmet Donut Scented Stress Balls
You’re probably used to the “looks like a donut” thing by now. We’re about to throw some serious curveballs at you, though. Starting right now!
These stress balls don’t just look like donuts – they smell like donuts, too!
How do they do it?
Well, we don’t know. Does it matter?
#7 Alcoholic Doughnuts
These doughnuts probably shouldn’t be a part of your well-balanced breakfast unless it’s a weekend because they have alcohol in them.
Habitat Doughnuts in Denver has made a bit of a name for themselves by whipping up various doughnuts with whiskey in them. They’ve got a whole line of them, really. But once you find out about this chocolate espresso doughnut with Bailey’s Irish Cream in it, you might start planning a trip to Colorado.
(They don’t ship these, for obvious reasons.)
#8 Donut Scented Candles
More donut smells!
Everyone knows our sense of taste is hugely interconnected with the olfactory senses. Just think about the last time someone walked in the room with a box of freshly baked donuts. Probably someone in the room on a diet pretended to be mad about how good they smelled!
You can get that delicious smell any time you want with these soy candled because they’ve been scented to remind you of delicious donuts.
No extra charge for the donut puns on the label!
#9 Mini Doughnut Maker
Alright, so if you are one of those people who’s trying not to eat so many doughnuts all the time… Well, first of all, you must also be a total masochist to still be looking at this post but maybe we can help you out anyway.
This awesome gadget allows you to create just 4 miniature doughnuts for yourself to enjoy. No going into a doughnut shop and facing all the temptation in there. No “it’s cheaper if you buy 10 more” upselling. Just 4 little doughnuts and you can even invite someone over to eat half of them!
#10 Stacked Donuts Jogging Pants
Nothing feels better than coming home after a long day of making the donuts and putting on some relaxing clothes.
These donut joggers deserve a place in your closet!
The comfy fabric is printed with a high-res image of stacked donuts! This particular design is mega-popular and frequently sold out, so if you like them then you should pick up a pair while you can.
#11 Sushi Doughnuts
Okay, don’t get mad.
Doughnuts are the best but you should eat some other food, too. Like, sushi. Sushi’s great. If it helps, this chef has created sushi doughnuts from the regular ingredients of some nice sushi.
Again, you can’t really buy this online but we’ve linked to the chef’s cookbook for you.
#12 Donut Eraser with Sprinkle Pushpins
Everyone with a donut friendly office space will want to know about this one.
Back to the “looks like a donut” theme, this time we’ve got a sweet looking donut eraser with pushpins included that look like (you guessed it) sprinkles!
Just make sure nobody steals your pins or you’ll end up with a really sad amount of sprinkles on your donut…
#13 Sprinkle Doughnut Throw Pillow
If you say the words “doughnut pillow” to someone, they’ll usually think you’re talking about something totally different. Or, actually, what they’ll think you’re talking about is totally a doughnut-shaped pillow like this but it’s made for really gross reasons and doesn’t look nearly this fun…
Anyway, these doughnut pillows actually look like doughnuts! Probably some guy had his childhood ruined by hearing a conversation about doughnut pillows and then finding out they weren’t what he was hoping they were…
#14 Donut Bath Bombs
You made it to the end of the day. You deserve to unwind with a nice bath.
Throw in a donut bath bomb and step that tub time up to your own personal spa experience!
You’ve also reached the end of this post – congrats!