Fertility Dress

Thaaaat is a cute white dress covered in a bunch of human sperm cells fertilizing some eggs.

That’s what that is.

We’re calling this a fertility dress.

Not because it’s supposed to help you meet the perfect life mate/sperm donor and not because it’ll make you more fertile when Mr. Right comes along. No dress can make those promises.

This is a fertility dress in the same way that little wood carved statues of guys with dongs 4x the size of the rest of their body are fertility statues. The same way that necklaces made of vaginal shells are fertility necklaces.

If you believe in magic, hey, good for you. When that biological clock just keeps on ticking down to 00:00, you’ll try anything.

But the rest of us are just appreciating the process by which we came to be here.

[Want more products with a sexual theme that may or may not make any sense at all? You’re looking for drunkMall’s Sex Sells gift guide!]

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