The Joker in Jail Clock
The Joker is one of the greatest villains in the history of fiction and a big part of the reason why is that it's always nothing more than a matter of time before he returns to wreak havoc on everything…
Glow-in-the-Dark Unbreakable Pints
It's the season of poolside and beach hangs, which means it's also the season of NO GLASS signs posted up on the outside of all the best party spots. If you like drinking canned beer, that's fine. But what's a…
Vibrating Sex Snorkel
Stay downtown for as long as it takes your partner to catch the O Train with a Snorkel O! Snorkel O is a non-intrusive breathing apparatus that fits in the wearer's nostrils. Rubber tubing connects to both sides of the nose…
Lucky Clover Kittens Shirt
You can probably still buy some amazing "wolves howling at the full moon" t-shirts in rundown truck stops across America. And you totally should because those shirts are Americana treasures! But you should also know that the genre of shirt…
Heavy Metal Emoji Keyboard
Praise Odin! Someone has finally given metalheads a seat at the emoji table by creating this third-party iOS keyboard with over 175 brand-new emojis. You've got longhaired hessian characters, whiskey bottles, middle fingers, bloody swords. Shit, they even gave you…
Hemp Soap on a Rope
Clean your body with good soap and good vibes, using this soap on a rope made with pure hemp seed oil. "Wait, aren't you a drunk shopping website? What's with the stoner gear?" Well, first, don't be a narc. Second,…
Iggy Pop Figurine
Iggy Pop is a force of nature. The dude has been turned up to 11 for decades at this point. Iggy is 69 years old. The Stooges are probably still the greatest hard rock band that ever existed and their…
Salt Shooting Bug Gun
Now this is the kind of pest control ingenuity we like to see in America! Why use a flyswatter to take down pesky houseflies when you can smoke 'em with a handgun?! That's a question the makers of Bug-A-Salt answered when…
Biography of Nicolas Cage
Unfortunately, Nicolas Cage has not yet written an autobiography. (Can you even imagine? No, you can't. There is no frame of reference for anything approaching how amazing it would be.) So, for now, those of us who are extremely obsessed…
Pacifier with Teeth
Is this a thing? Like, are parents buying pacifiers like this and having their babies use them to freak out strangers in public or what? Because in The '80s and '90s, when everyone stated going to raves and doing first…
French Fry Cutter
This gadget makes prepping potatoes for french fries so very simple. As you can see, there's a slot for you to insert a chef's knife (not included), if you'd rather cube up some home fries. You think every fast food…
Fish Training Kit
Fish are pretty worthless as pets. They live in a tank and you feed them. Hopefully they look cool because that's all they're good for... Until now! Ever wanted a pet fish that could swim a slalom, score a soccer…