EXCLUSIVE: Life Hacks for Sale
Are you SICK & TIRED of all these PROBLEMS IN YOUR LIFE?!?! Spoiler Alert: Pro Tip - You need some LIFE HACKS! Before drunkMall, it used to be quite an undertaking to find some decent life hacks. You can only…
Power Saw Pizza Cutter
Start practicing that Tool Time brand of "ho ho ho" now... Just in time for Christmas, it's the circular saw pizza cutter! Making pizza at home instead of ordering delivery is to do the noble thing instead of the lazy…
Hello Kitty Ice Cube Tray
Oh no, it's too cute! Make it stop! Hello Kitty has been non-stop ramming adorable products down our throats for, what, forty years at this point? (Yeah, that's real. Look it up.) Well, you shouldn't be surprised. This is yet…
Kitchen Tablet Holder
Hang that tablet up at eye level, away from the huge mess you're making trying to follow that recipe you found on Pinterest! Cooking at home has never been easier than it is today. We have all sorts of sweet…
Whale Knife
Whale that's a pretty cool knife right there! Don't get it wrong - just because this chef's knife looks exactly like a cute whale doesn't mean you shouldn't respect it or treat it with the same reverence as some overpriced…
Churro Makers
Ever had those crunchy cinnamon stick desserts at Taco Bell? Oh, don't pretend you're better than that! We've all made regrettable dietary decisions after last call. It's part of the deal... Anyway, those fast food dessert sticks have about as much…
EXCLUSIVE: Zombiepocalypse
If you're reading this then the zombie apocalypse hasn't happened. Yet. But ask anyone who's seen, like, a single news headline from the year 2016 how possible it is for a zombiepocalypse to go down and they'll probably tell you…
Watermelon Slicer and Server
As the weather turns from warm to windy, those gatherings of friends and family you'd normally have outdoors move inside the house. All that sloppy drunkenness, sticky food and social mayhem goes from the backyard - the easily-hosed-off, "let nature…
EXCLUSIVE: On Becoming a Night Owl
Night owls have gotten a bad reputation throughout history. But that's horseshit because some of the smartest and most creative individuals who ever lived did a lot of that living well after the witching hour. Some famous examples include: Winston…
Tabby Cat Salt and Pepper Holder
A salt and pepper holder for all the cat lovers! It's like a totally cute and helpful tabby cat always there with the spices you want to punch up your meal. Which is a cute fantasy because cats are not…
Cap Catching Bottle Opener
Stop popping bottles and just letting the caps fall all over the place! That shit is sloppy. You're better than that, kids. Your house is your temple. Keep it clean. This bottle opener - spoiler alert - removes the caps…
One-Handed Bottle Opener
What a neat bottle opener! The little magnet in the top keeps the whole unit locked in place so you only need to push up on the lever to pop the cap on that beer (or soda) bottle. When not in…