Custom Guitar Pick Maker
You can make guitar picks out of all sorts of things with this sweet gadget! As long as it's 1mm thick or less (that's bigger than it looks, ladies - we swear), then you're good to go! Depending on what…
Polaroid Toilet Paper Roll and Camera-Shaped Holder
A picture is worth a thousand words, so... Eh, maybe we won't finish that thought. If you don't think about the philosophical implications of wiping butts with nice pictures of houses and flowers and clouds and stuff, this is a pretty…
Bluetooth Earmuffs
Strangers are the worst. You could be walking down the street wearing a shirt that says "DON'T TALK TO ME" written in fresh blood and still some guy will think he's the one person that has something you need to…
Jalapeno Corer with Grilling Rack
Man, it's been a little while since we had some HEAT up on drunkMall, you know? That spice is where it's at in life, people! It makes us feel alive! We need it! Seriously, spicy food is just as much…
McDonald Trump canvas print
It’s almost worth having to read about Donald Trump every day in order for this artwork to exist. Like, if we could trade, we would but we can’t, so we’ll take the artistic commentary. This is more interesting than anything…
Smoking Monkey clock
drunkMall doesn’t endorse smoking cigarettes but monkeys doing people things is the height of comedy, so, we’ll forgive the square. We still have questions. Like, is this monkey a Shriner? And how exactly is this a clock? We can answer…
Can Crusher
Empty cans take up a lot of space You ever think about that? People who go through, say for example, a 12-pack (of Surge) a night - these problems present themselves. There’s some super complicated physics explanation for why it…
Party Toilet Night Light
Now this is a product with wide-reaching appeal! From scared kids to nerdy teens to wasted party guests to blind senior citizens, humans at every stage of life can appreciate a motion-activated toilet bowl light. It isn’t just a nightlight…
Texting Gloves
Aw, yeah! Texting can be brutal in cold climates. Use any part of your body on a touchscreen and it works fine. (Any part. We checked. Yeah, we checked that part, too.) But just try texting while wearing your favorite…
100 Pairs of Dice
Pop Quiz: when do you need dice? If you said, “Five minutes after a wormhole opens inside the game closet and blasts random stuff, like all the dice, into nineteen other dimensions,” congratulations - that is the correct answer! You’ve won…
Stress Balls with Super Annoying Faces
Most stress is caused by the sounds that come out of human faces. Therefore, it’s possible that stress balls would be more effective if they resembled annoying human faces, which these do. And the faces get even more annoying when…
Obamanopoly board game
You thought your uncle got pissed off when you beat him in regular monopoly? Wait until you kick his ass because you come out of a government bailout with an extra $100k in your pocket! In this twist on the…