The Taco Cleanse

Every few years a new “cleanse” comes around and all the Pinterest mommies with baby strollers in the crowded coffee shop talk way too loudly about how OMG AMAZING they feel after doing it.

It’s all bullshit.

You know why?

Because it’s not tacos.

Anything that isn’t tacos is bullshit.

If you made a Venn diagram of the intersection between tacos and bullshit, the two circles would not be touching because tacos are not bullshit and everything that is bullshit is Not Tacos. Are we clear on this?

Good.

Because the next thing you need to know about is The Taco Cleanse.

Will it change your life?

Uh, buddy. Can you read?

It says right there on the cover that this tortilla-based diet is proven to change your life. Proven! And you know what, we believe that, because our friend told us about it over coffee this morning and she said she feels OMG AMAZING!

[Find more cheat codes for existence in drunkMall’s Life Hacks for Sale gift guide!]

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