Everyone has gotten lost on their way to Poundtown before. It happens to the best of us, no matter how well you plan the route, make sure you pee before leaving home, double-check that the space heater is unplugged... Doesn't…
Each box of Enchanted Unicorn Bandages contains 15 large, sterile latex strip bandages. But these aren't your everyday boo-boo bandages! Oh no! These have extra Unicorn Power* and rainbows and sparkly stars! Whether you fell off your skateboard or had…
drunkMall is a humor website and, let's be honest, there is an unprecedented level of comedy in the 2016 American Presidential Election. Like, if you haven't been watching the GOP Debates, you're missing some of the best television of the…
"THAT'S not a boomerang!" All right, Crocodile Dundee, hang on a minute. That famous boomerang shape we've all known since childhood is a death trap, son. History lesson. Boomerangs are mostly known for being used by the indigenous people of Australia.…
Ever want to shove a bunch of candy up the backside of a ferocious dinosaur and then beat it with a stick? Of course you have! Who wouldn't want to do that? You know, there's probably a person whose entire…
Handle with care! Okay, so, yeah, the chances of getting several uses out of it aren't very high but so what? It's bubble wrap lingerie! Costing way less than similar items made from traditional fabric, what better way to show off…
How ya feelin' today? Good? Stop feeling good! Nothing is good, man! Everything feels bad, man! If you're scared and confused about being yelled at right now, ya need ta brush up on ya meme game, son! This is Pepe,…
Oh, buddy... This notebook is perfect for anyone who keeps a journal because that's all a journal usually ends up being, a list of people you'd like to punch in the face, the reasons why you want to punch them…
Give yourselves a hand! No, really! How'd you like to have an extra hand when you're using your phone? Or maybe you'd like to feel like you've got some friendly support when you find yourself in the middle of a…
Highly recommended for fans of the Anchorman film franchise, as well as mathematicians and statisticians everywhere, it's the officially licensed Sex Panther t-shirt! Carefully distressed, to give it that, "Look, baby, I've been a sex panther for a while now. This…
Do people who live in trailer parks still put fake pink flamingos in their tiny little yards? When was the last time anyone even saw a trailer park? Anyway, if you don't know, that's a thing people used to do…
Nicolas Cage is The One True God. Don't believe it? Ask /r/onetruegod. They'll tell you. And since he is The One True God, he must inherently contain within himself all possible dualities, masculinity/femininity, light/dark, good/evil, etc. This explains why he is…