Desperate Horse Wives
With a title like that, it doesn't even matter what the book is about. We're thinking about buying fifty copies and discreetly leaving them in the homes of everyone we know just to see how long it takes everyone to…
The Fetish (Adult) Coloring Book
See that cover? Yeah, it’s like that. Coloring books are going through a weird transformation right now. The yoga pants, juice cleanse, brunch crowd decided coloring is a healthy and relaxing activity for adults. Who knows? Whatever. It’s brought about…
The Bro-job short story
Okay, so nobody at drunkMall HQ remembers finding this - or at least nobody wants to admit to finding it. Yet here it is, in all its red, white & blue glory: The Bro-job! Gotta be honest, the lack of…
Smartphone Seduction Book
A collection of witty, flirty pre-written texts you can send to that beautiful girl you just met… Yeah, if you’re trying to be on the front page of /r/cringepics tomorrow. Ask your grandfather if he remembers the advertisements in the…
The Universe Doesn’t Give a Flying Fuck About You
That’s a really good title for a book. No idea what it’s about but good title. Any of you drunkMall shoppers ever read House of Leaves? That is one hell of a book. One of the main characters is named…
Bill Murray Coloring Book
Bill Murray is pretty clearly the man. He’s been the man for a long, long time. (Except we’re scared to see that new movie he’s in because we’ve heard bad things and someone should tell him Wes Anderson stopped making…
F*ck Feelings book
YEEEEEESSSS Finally, someone had the nerve to stop tiptoeing around, sprinkling self-help adages everywhere. This is what’s up: how many times have you made a terrible decision because of some type of way you felt? Yeah, you know why? Feelings…
Unicorns Are Jerks coloring book
Seriously, what did you expect? You think some mythological creature that everyone spends their whole childhood freaking out over is just gonna be chill? No. When was the last time you were around a cat? Yeah, cats haven’t been worshipped…
Superhero Bookend
Thanks to some science stuff this bookend appears to defy the laws of gravity to hold your books up! Superhuman Study Swag Too triumphant for you? Consider the moose skull bookends. Share this post!
The Little Book of Butts
You like butts. Know how we know? Because EVERYBODY likes butts. This is a book about butts. It’s a good book to give to people who love butts and people who don’t love butts because it’s a book about butts.…
Rude Hand Gestures of the World handbook
Language barriers can be very annoying. Sometimes you need to tell someone to go have sex with toilet but you have no idea how to say it in words they’ll understand - so forget about using words! Here’s a handy…
Moose Skull Bookends
Obviously these are replicas because a real moose skull with antlers would be the size of a lawn chair but, at 8.5″ tall, these bookends will fit on most bookshelves and keep your books upright in style. Each piece weighs…