Beer Shirt
If you aren't half full of beer and hanging out in a sleeveless shirt at least one day a week then you're doing summer all wrong. None of that "craft" beer bullshit, either. This is America. You show up to…
Dog Poop Bag Communicator
Beam up the dog poop, Scotty. Scotty... Come on, Scotty - beam up the dog poop! Scotty never beams up the dog poop, does he? Oh, if life could only be that simple. But no, this isn't a beloved science…
PARTY: Game Night!
Games are serious business. Some people don't have an appreciation for a good party game but that's their loss! Everyone with a closet full of board games at home knows how to spend a Thursday night the right way! Then…
Samurai Armor for Cats
It's a dog eat dog world out there - and cats? Holy shit, you don't even want to know what cats are capable of doing to each other. It's ferocious. The type of shit you'd only read about in textbooks…
5 Pounds of Misprinted Pens
When was the last time you needed a pen and couldn't find one? If you're like us, it's happened to you at least once since you started reading this sentence. Where the fuck are all the pens?!? People steal pens.…
Dachsund Ice Cube Tray
Hot dog? In this weather?! You must be out of your mind! A "hot" anything is not what the doctor ordered for the summer of 2017, people. We need to cool it on down, lil doggies! Cool doggies... Cold dogs... Ice…
Buddha Butter Dish
Do you ever wonder how Buddha got fat? Well, friend, here's the deal: that's the wrong question to ask. Look at that Buddha. See how happy he is? That's what you should want to know - how did Buddha get…
Make It Rain Iron-On Patch
Life and nothin' but patches and money! Makin' it rain makes the world go 'round, if you think about it. You're out there on a hustle, trying to do whatever it takes for that raincloud of cash to find its…
Minecraft Torch
It's always so badass when the good guy in a movie wraps a ripped up shirt around a piece of wood, douses it in lighter fluid and turns it into a makeshift torch. Everyone wishes they could do that at…
Mushroom Lamp
You can never have too many options for light. Owning one less light than you need is the same as owning a hundred less - you're still left sitting in the dark, which is not where you want to be.…
Chainmail Skillet Scrubber
What is clean may never rust! Now that winter is here, we're prepared for anything at any turn - checking around corners for our enemies, watching out for double-crosses from "close friends" and of course just waiting for a spot…
Conspiracy Theory Board Game
Tired of arguing over conspiracy theories with your friends and acquaintances? Of course you are. Everyone is. There's no reason any of us should be discussing politics one-tenth of the amount that we have to do every single day now.…