Fingertip Food Tongs
We need more inventions focused on helping drunk people avoid appearing as sloppy as they may or may not be. Trongs (reason for the name unclear) are miniature food tongs you can place on your fingertips to handle messy, greasy…
Time-Released Pet Feeder
Many people who have pets have had to end a good night out before they were ready. Why? Because they were responsible people and had to go home to feed the animals. If they had a feeder that automatically dispensed…
LED Necktie
Hey, we know how it is. You’ve got a day job but that doesn’t make you a square, man! You’re hip - we get it! But how are you gonna let today’s counterculture youth know you’re not The Man, man?…
Macho Man Randy Savage shirt
Dig it! Y’all loved that Ric Flair shirt but the madness is runnin’ WILD over here at drunkMall because we found a Macho Man shirt! OOOOOOH YEAH! Best there is! Past! Present! And future! Share this post!
Beanie with Built-In Bluetooth Headset
Just in case, you know, it’s cold and you don’t mind people wondering for a couple minutes longer than if you had a regular Bluetooth earpiece whether or not you’re a totally insane person, walking in circles and talking to…
10 Planets Drinking Glasses
Pluto is a planet in our book, okay? Ok. Now that that’s out of the way, who wouldn’t want a set of drinking glasses that look like the planets in our solar system? Probably people who aren’t smart enough to…
Ric Flair T-Shirt
WOO! I’m gonna tell you somethin’ right now, Mean Gene! Ric Flair is the champion! And to be the man! You’ve gotta beat the man! WOO! Get stylin’ and profilin’ now! Share this post!
Superhero Bookend
Thanks to some science stuff this bookend appears to defy the laws of gravity to hold your books up! Superhuman Study Swag Too triumphant for you? Consider the moose skull bookends. Share this post!
Woodies Bamboo Sunglasses
These wayfarers are ice cold, kids! Check those blue/green polarized lenses! The arms are made from 100% real bamboo for a natural look and feel. Stronger than steel but half the weight of a pair of Ray-Bans. Share this post!
Tupac Shakur “Thug Life” sweatpants
Lest any of y’all punks forget that we can like Hall & Oates and still be hard, feast ya hatin’ eyes on these intense sweatpants. All Tupac has to say to you is “R U still down?” Lounge around with…
Cuddle Pillow
Cutting off the circulation to one arm has long been the plight of the big spoon in every extended cuddle session - but no more! The Armadillow is thicker on one side - so the person at the back has…
SleepPhones: Headphones in a Headband
Trying to lay down while listening to music on headphones (or earbuds) S-U-C-K-S but SleepPhones has the solution - speakers in a comfortable headband! Dial up your sleepytime playlist and get comfy. [Psst, we're not trying to call you out…