Pink Taser with LED Flashlight
This stun gun with a flashlight is surprisingly cheap. You’ve probably paid more money for just a regular flashlight that wouldn’t completely incapacitate a person for being a threat. Share this post!
The Shocker Keychain
So wrong, yet so funny. Probably the quickest way to let someone know what kind of person you are, too! Right on your keychain, which is why drunkMall loves keychains! This keychain is made by Choy Boy Designs and they have…
Ouija Board Pillowcase
drunkMall is not responsible for the dreams you have while sleeping on this ouija board print pillowcase! Seriously, how many horror movies have you seen where it all starts with someone playing around with a ouija board? Yeah, duh, we…
Go Girl Female Urination Device
For when you’re camping in New Mexico and don’t want to squat to pee and accidentally sit on a stinging nettle plant and have your ass burn the rest of the day. Or you decided to go down to Times…
Venus Flytraps
It’s a well-known fact that carnivorous plants make a dorm room much more.. uh… carnivorous. These vicious little guys are so cute! Recommended for people who like the idea of having a pet but are too irresponsible or aren't…
Purrito Tote Bag
Too cute! Cats and Mexican food, what else is there in life? While we wouldn't actually eat a cat-filled burrito, the idea of one is pretty damn adorable. Like when you see a baby and start saying things like, "Oh, I…
Life-Sized Cardboard Thor
The great thing about being an adult is you don’t have to explain to anyone why you have something like this in your house. In fact, they’ll feel weird for wanting to ask you about it! And then even if…
USB Wall Charger/Spy Cam
Trying to catch someone handling some shady business on the phone? If only there was a way to see what’s draining their battery so fast! Or, actually, it makes more sense to use this to make sure nobody is trying…
Boo-Boos Gross-Out Bandages
These gross-out adhesive bandages provide all the benefits of regular adhesive bandages, while making things look much, much worse than they are! There are several varieties and some of them are truly horrible to look at. Ulcerous lesions and... ugh,…
Fake Mustache Variety Pack
Anyone can make their next 36 Tinder dates extra special with these assorted mustaches! Bonus Points for getting called out on the prosthetic and selling a sob story about being “follically challenged”... No really, though, fake mustaches are one of…
Gigantic Wine Glass
So we’ve all read that some doctors say a glass of wine is fine - but did they say what size glass? Because this sucker holds an entire bottle of wine. It's perfect for those of us who've moved past…
Donald Trump Pinata
Everyone who wants to take a swing get in line! Okay, whoa… We didn’t know there would be so many of you. Wow. Geez, um, okay we’re gonna have to do this like the DMV. Take a number and go…