Old School Cool wall tapestry
Has anyone reading this ever even seen a wall tapestry? Okay, well have you ever seen Freaks & Geeks? A wall tapestry is the kind of thing one of those kids would make sure they put up before having people…
A Telescope
You may ask, “Why have you posted a telescope on drunkMall?” Let us remind you that this is a website for people who like to shop when they’ve been drinking. None of this has to make any sense. For instance, we…
Translucent Millennium Falcon Lamp
It’s safe to say you can expect pretty regular drunkMall appearances from the Star Wars franchise until all this hype dies down in neverteen years. At 10" tall x 6″ wide, the Millennium Falcon lamp is a nice size for…
Desk Holster
First of all, we suggest using this under-the-desk holster for not-a-real gun, such as a rubber band machine gun or a Nerf Rival Blaster. Party Tip: don’t keep a real gun under your desk! It contributes to nervousness and poor…
Heated Massage Seat Cushion
Being cold sucks. What else sucks is not being massaged, like, all the time. That’s how rich people get to live. Nothing but warmth and massages all day. Turns out, it doesn’t cost that much money to be warm and…
“Magic Finger” throw pillow
Remember this trick? Always a crowd pleaser. Even the very first time, it’s obvious the guy isn’t taking the tip of his thumb off over and over again. But that’s what makes illusions so awesome! We know what we’re seeing…
Santa’s Spacebag
It’s the Christmas stocking with the stuffer we all really want: booze! You’ve seen it on your Facebook and Instagram for weeks. It’s totally real. But it’s also totally sold out. If you don’t want to pay scalper prices, probably…
Optical Illusion Coffee Cup LED Lamp
Everyone loves a good optical illusion, right? Here’s an oldie but a goodie - the fake waterfall effect - with a caffeinated spin. The LED lamp head is covered with a coffee cup, so the stand looks like coffee is…
Skeleton Pirate Bottle Holder
Man, that skeleton pirate knows how to party… While he’s happiest with wine and spiced rum, Skully here can hold most normally shaped bottles of booze, which is good because keeping a bottle around long enough for a bottle holder…
Bacon Piggy Bank
Have you ever heard the phrase “saved your bacon”? That actually comes from the very first piggy banks, which were literally made out of bacon. Nah, we just made that bullshit up. But this is a piggy bank that looks like bacon.…
Gold Record of the Footloose Soundtrack Autographed by Kenny Loggins
Ah, Footloose! Never before or since has a film so accurately portrayed what life was like for those of us who grew up in a small town where dancing was illegal and we solved conflicts by driving tractors toward one…
Dainty Darth Vader prints
We can’t get enough of this weird Star Wars original fan artwork! This is by Kyle Hagey and he’s got an Etsy shop full of crazy stuff like this. Go check it out now because we’ve got a pretty good…