It's festival season in America. A magical combination of music and camping that's really only enjoyable when intoxicated on a mixture of alcohol, sun exposure and whatever the hell was in those pills that dude with the dreadlocks had... Heading into a…
We need more technological clothing like this. At least until we're all walking around with android body implants and stuff, which could take another 100 years, it only makes sense to use the resources currently at our disposal. And it doesn't…
Honestly, this is how we all should have been slicing pizzas this entire time. Why is this only happening now? A pair of scissors with a built-in serving tray just makes so much sense for so many reasons. First of all,…
An extremely durable phone charger cable that also serves as a convenient stand for hands-free reading and watching? Are you serious? Is this even real life right now? Every phone should ship with these cables because the ones they send…
Drinking hot coffee in the Summer is... Just, what? Why would you want to do that at all? Like, "Oh, it's a hundred degrees outside. Who wants to go drink hot liquid together?" Nobody, Gary. Nobody wants to drink hot…
Hide that beer by making it look like an ordinary can of soda! We're always posting elaborate "solutions" for taking adult beverages out into the world, sometimes disguised, sometimes not. We found The Wine Rack, The Beer Belly and a bunch…
Stop losing your sunglasses to bodies of water! The bottom of a swimming pool can be a pretty great place to score a free pair of fancy sunglasses the morning after a good party. Sometimes people who spent the whole day…
There are two kinds of people in the world: people with cracked phone screens and people with non-cracked phone screens. Now think about the people you know with cracked phone screens. (Maybe you're one of these people.) Would you say these folks generally…
A small strap that attaches to the back of a phone to make it easy to hold with one hand? Uh, yes, please! Honestly, why don't phones ship with these installed already? Oh, because everyone's obsessed with being able to…
Unlock doors using a smartphone! Here at drunkMall, we're always saying how important it is to not leave home with car keys while intending to drink. The only keys a drunk person should have in their possession are the keys necessary to…
The excellence and utility of this clamp-on cupholder can not be overstated. Most of us begin life with supreme confidence, even cockiness, in our ability to temporarily place a cup of liquid on or near important belongings without suffering ill…
Cool your canned or bottled beverages down to ice cold temperatures in just a minute with this rapid cooling device! Everyone knows that trick where you take a warm drink and roll it back and forth over some ice to…