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Unicorn Light Wall Hook

Unicorn Light Wall Hook

A hanging hook right where you need one is a magical thing - just like unicorn! Actually, the hanging hook is kind of even better than unicorns because the hanging hook really exists and also it can look exactly like…

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Top 20 Drunk Buys of 2016

EXCLUSIVE: Top 20 Drunk Buys of 2016

This is the main event, people! 2016 was the first full year that drunkMall was in operation. (Of course, that didn't stop us from doing a Top Ten Drunk Buys of 2015, based on only a few months of info.)…

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Christmas Cash Spending Bash

EXCLUSIVE: Christmas Cash Spending Bash

Okay, people, this is what we play for! As of right now it is Christmas mutha flippin' Eve and that means we're well on the inside of 24 hours until the annual ritual of reaping many gifts and rewards for…

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Unicorn Ring

Unicorn Ring

Finding a new favorite ring is a magical thing - magical like a unicorn! Fantasy fans and lovers of mystical creatures need look no further for a unique piece of jewelry. This unicorn ring is handcrafted from copper-coated brass, then…

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Pinata Clock

Pinata Clock

The clock for when you'd hit it anytime of day or night, 24/7! How you know this clock is really about that life is that it doesn't even have any numbers on it. Just a (honestly kinda weird looking) pinata…

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Life Size Horse Lamp

Life Size Horse Lamp

Whoa, Nelly... Here's an, uh, interesting choice in furniture. It's like a lamp, except on top of a full-size statue of a horse. Or, here's another way to look at it. If you've ever wanted a modern art style replica…

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Vampire Unicorn Blanket

Vampire Unicorn Blanket

Not all unicorns are perfectly white and symbolic of peace and innocence, you know. Some of 'em are downright wicked fuckers, they are! Take this lesser-known vampiric subspecies of unicorn. Purple coat, dark mane, pink eyes and menacing bat-like wings...…

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Unicorn Rainbow Tape Dispenser

Unicorn Rainbow Tape Dispenser

You can't glue the broke pieces of your life back together with unicorns and rainbows but if you need to, like, tape an envelope shut or some administrative shit like that - we've got great news for you - that…

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My Little Pony Hooded Poncho

My Little Pony Hooded Poncho

It really doesn't get anymore "I don't give a shit what you think about me" than wearing a My Little Pony poncho with pink pony head hood on it! Where would you wear something like this, you ask? Uh, where wouldn't…

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Unicorns Are Jerks coloring book

Unicorns Are Jerks – A Coloring Book

Unicorns ARE jerks! Think about it. Have you seen Mean Girls? Okay, those were some pretty ruthless bitches in that movie, right? Right. Now imagine if those mean popular girls were literally mythological creatures. And they knew it. And they were…

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Horse Head Squirrel Feeder

Horse Head Squirrel Feeder

Backyard squirrels are always horsin' around anyway - make it official with a horse head feeder! If this reminds you of those super creepy horse head masks that became weirdly popular over the last three years or so, there's a…

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Animal Butt Magnets

Animal Butt Magnets

This set of magnets looks like the backsides of a bunch of different barnyard animals! You've got a sheep's butt, a rooster's tail, a pig's rump, a bull's behind, a cow's udder-ly huge hind end and a horse's ass! It's…

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